"paid" an old friend a visit this morning...

So I finally did it. I got up at 6 am and went running this morning after a week and a half hiatus. I stretched A LOT before I went out because I was determined to have a GOOD, PAIN FREE run. When I first got outside I walked for about 5 minutes just to get warmed up and get pumped about my run. I'll admit I was still a little nervous about it...

Well I started to run and it felt A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! My stride was fantastic and I felt like it was so effortless, almost like I was floating in air. I never feel light on my feet so it was AWESOME! I was SO incredibly HAPPY to be out running, feeling the cool morning air on my face while listening to some new running music :)! I had missed this SO MUCH and this is what I have been missing. This past week was HARD for me. I felt sluggish and depressed. I tried doing other workouts at home, but nothing even came close to giving me the same high that running gives me. I even ate SO BAD this weekend and gained 4 lbs! I'm not too worried about that though. I'm back to good eating, portion control and no eating after 7 pm this week :). The thing about eating fatting, greasy food is that it HURTS your stomach when you haven't had it for awhile. So my stomach was hurting and feeling SO bloated...not fun.

Anyway back to my run lol...I knew that as soon as I felt ANY kind of pain I was going to STOP because I DO NOT want to take another 2 weeks off to recoup. I ran about 1/4 mile and then I felt it...this little dull pain in my left knee(on the outside), the same pain that bothered me at the Dirty Dash. The first time I ever felt this pain was when we moved into our 3rd floor apartment last December. It was AWFUL and I do not like the feeling that my knee has dislocated from my leg. So I ran a little further to see if it turned into anything or if it was all in my head( I wish!), the pain started to increase so I stopped to stretch it out. Stretching was the only thing that got me through the Dirty Dash. After I stretched I walked for probably 5 minutes and then started to SLOWLY run again just to see where I was at. Well I didn't make it even a 1/4 mile before it started to hurt again so again I stopped, stretched and walked. After 5 more minutes of walking I was determined to run a little more just so I could feel a little satisfied with my efforts. I got to one of my usual corners and started running and yes because its me here I pushed it and went fast to get more in before my knee acted up. I got in another 1/4 mile in and then the pain. Now I was SO beyond FRUSTRATED at this point because I WANTED to run so bad. I am 26 years old and have so many issues with my body and running. Why can't my body just DEAL?? It was KILLING me to have to walk but I did not want to do more damage...so there I was walking home. I walked until I hit 2 miles just so I felt like it was worth it.

Although I am upset about the fact that I couldn't just run, run ,run like I wanted I'm still happy with the fact that I got some motivation back. I have been really missing it and am determined to take baby steps towards complete recovery. I have been dreaming about running non stop lately and to my pleasant surprise woke up 5 minutes before my alarm this morning ready to attack my day. All I can do is keep trying and keep stretching and icing until I get better. I don't know why I feel so ashamed when I have to walk because that stills gets me sweating if I walk fast and far. If walking gets me back to where I can start running again then I am all for it! My hubby thinks I should stick to the treadmill for awhile since it isn't as hard on your joints. I tried explaining to him that it is so exhilarating to run outside in the morning and its about to get cold soon so I need to take advantage. I know he is only looking out for my best interest and he may be right, but I would rather walk outside than run in on the treadmill at this point. Although I may throw in a treadmill run this week just to see if there is any difference with my knee.

Oh also this was my first run since the Dirty D and washing my muddy shoes lol. I washed them twice because well you saw the picture in the previous post...and did not dry them because I was afraid of them not fitting well anymore. Well they were STIFF and my toes rubbed a lot this run, which did not feel too nice lol. Once I get new shoes I will keep these as my Dirty D shoes :) since I plan on doing it again next year!

I may run/walk in the morning or I may go to a spinning class so we'll see :). Also some GREAT news my Achilles Tendon did not hurt at all :)!! One injury down and one to go...



See you tomorrow!

Overcoming obstacles

So I had an interesting 4 days off. Although my Achilles tendon was on the mend I stayed away from running to let it heal properly. At first it was hard because the road seems to call my name and I just can't resist. But then I became comfortable with staying in my warm bed and the idea of running outside in the cold and dark, which it is at 6 am, began to scare me. Yes, I said scared me....I don't know why but the idea of being out there alone, which used to make me feel empowered and full of life, now made me feel small and vulnerable. Maybe I am losing it but it was really a STRUGGLE to get myself to commit to going out this morning. Although when my alarm went off at 6:00 am I rose out of bed quite alert. Now maybe it was the nerves but whatever it was it helped, A LOT. I got dressed and did my stretches and decided that I was going to give the clubhouse treadmill a spin. That idea made me feel lots better until I walked in the clubhouse which was pitch black and so quiet. I turned a bunch of lights on and that calmed my nerves, BUT the treadmill is BROKEN.... So frustrating. I however took that as a sign that I just NEED to run OUTSIDE. Now I weighed out my options which was 1. go back home and get another hour of sleep and feel yucky having not worked out yet again, or 2. just RUN OUTSIDE and GET OVER my weird issue! Well I choose option 2 :)

I went back home and grabbed my hoodie and then was off. Now I was still skiddish about being out there which is ridiculous because I live in a GREAT community with some AWESOME people. Still I have issues decided to say heck to my usual routes and just run around the complex a couple times. I was half way around my first time and straight ahead of me I could see the Timpanogos Temple. Even from the distance it looked so BEAUTIFUL all lite up on the hill. I immediately felt calm and happy. Almost like my old self decided to re inhabit my body. I stared at the temple the entire stretch and when I turned the corner I decided to go on part of my route. It had started to get a little lighter out which helped but I know that seeing the temple is what really helped me to realize that I don't need to be so afraid and paranoid. I know that if I am living my life righteously and doing the things that I should that I will be OK. I finished my run with a decent time and a 2 mile total. I was not so worried about those today like I usually am. I was focused on myself and overcoming something that has been quite the obstacle.

I allowed my fear to keep me from doing what makes me happy. My hubby and I are on a journey towards something so AMAZING for our family( to learn more about what I believe go HERE) and I now know that this will not be the last obstacle that I face. It took a lot to overcome it and I'm sure tomorrow morning will be another struggle, but I've learned in my life that struggles MAKE YOU STRONGER! I know that I can overcome anything that comes my way.

Also I felt so GOOD after my run! I always do and never regret it. 



photo:
Just Run.


See you tomorrow!

p.s. I started a 4 week challenge today. Here is to eating healthy and tracking it through myfitnesspal.com!